This YouTube video by Psych2Go lists 11 ways to outsmart a narcissist. Malignant narcissists thrive on abusive relationships and controlling other people. They utilize cruel methods to dominate their victims’ lives. The methods of defense given in the video depend on denying a narcissist of emotional drama.

  1. Heal yourself: If you have left a relationship with a narcissist, you’ll be tempted to go back to them when you feel vulnerable and down on yourself. Take the time to get your life in order.
  2. Mirror their behavior: Narcissists enjoy pushing people’s buttons. Instead of reacting emotionally, try to match their energy and show them what it’s like being treated the way they treat you.
  3. Cut off contact: Get away from the toxic relationship.
  4. Use the Grey Rock method: If you can’t cut off contact with the narcissist, subdue your emotions and be boring, like a grey rock. Starve the narcissist of the drama they enjoy.
  5. Agree with them: This sounds counterintuitive, but it takes away the satisfaction a narcissist gets from shaming you. Again, you’re cutting them off from your emotions.
  6. Keep your cards close to your chest: Narcissists exploit their victims’ vulnerabilities and insecurities. Therefore, one should keep certain things secret. Don’t try to rationalize or explain your position, just give them your best poker face.
  7. Challenge your own thoughts and situation: Narcissists are actually very insecure, so they project their own shortcomings onto others. When the narcissist talks down to you, think carefully whether it makes sense. Be objective, so you can see whether you’re really the problem, or they are.
  8. You need to remain very calm: This can be difficult, but it’s related to the Grey Rock method. Don’t react emotionally, but be logical.
  9. Find ways to disengage: Narcissists crave attention, whether it’s positive or negative. If they tell you a sob story, guilt trip you, or demand you prioritize them over yourself, tune them out instead. You have the right take care of yourself, and they would respect that if they were mentally healthy.
  10. Refuse to play: Narcissists take pleasure in controlling and abusing people, not in meaningful relationships. Don’t try to argue with them or one up them, because the argument itself is fun to them. Remove yourself from the battle.
  11. Listen to your body: Narcissistic abuse can cause trauma and stress. Meditation, deep breathing, and visualization can counteract these injuries and help you find your calm. Meditation is done by focusing your thoughts on a single object or area of your body, such as the chakras.

You don’t need to use all of these methods, as each situation is different. Dip your toe in one technique or another, do what feels comfortable to you, then use the methods that are similar.

Psych2Go’s Video Page And Resource Links:

Support My Blog And Yourself – Helpful Resources: